My dearest darling readers:
You must have missed me ever so much! I know I sure missed you! What a whirlwind it’s been (figuratively and literally, just see my hair dancing around below). It’s been a long, long, long two weeks in Phoenix and Jamaica, but I’m back in Maryland, hanging out in a Johnny Cupcakes tee-shirt, recovering from a slight sunburn and a lack of sleep and clean clothes.
Here are some of the highlights and lowlights of my trips.
- Strange Maine woman waiting for a connecting flight in Baltimore airport with 80′s bleached-blonde hair (complete with poodlesque poofs), an undying love for “Jagameistah”, and a hatred for salesman
- Standing on my feet for 14-hour days at the Phoenix West Convention Center
- Kayaking and swimming despite the rocks, crabs, and petrifying waves
- 4:45 a.m. wake-up calls
- Swinging in hammocks, day drinking, and afternoon naps
- Swingers. So many swingers in Jamaica.
- Not having to cook, shop, or worry about anything on the home front for two weeks.
- Piles and piles and piles of unread mail (of the snail and e varieties)
- Not getting to see my babycat for two weeks
- Flight from Montego Bay to Orlando to Atlanta to Baltimore and not getting home until 2 a.m. Yawn…
- Weird sunburn on only the back of one leg. What?
- The mustaches and other facial hair arrangements at the Phoenix airport
So there you have it. It’s almost like you were right there with me, yeah? Now I’m going to transfer my laundry from the washer to the dryer and smear some aloe on the lone burnt leg. Peace mon.